Somehow the years seem to fly by more quickly nowadays. They all seem to blend in together too, at least in my memory. When I was thinking of what to write for this post I thought that this was the year I had taken my break from working. That was actually last year.
I don’t think it’s a sign that I’m growing old. Maybe more of a sign of the fact that I’ve settled in to some sort of routine that makes it difficult to tell the days or even years apart. Nothing significant changes, I guess.
Except it does. There are changes. This year, I’ve traveled to new places, met new people, engaged in new activities, worked with some new technology, enjoyed new things. But nothing really life-changing I guess. Or nothing stands out. I wonder if all humans live their lives this way and go through the same ruminations that I do.
Something’s been going on lately. I’ve received something of an offer, to try something new and exciting. But it means walking away from the familiar. Taking a risk. There was a time I would have berated myself for even considering not taking on such a new thing. Maybe that time has passed? Like I said, I’ve fallen into some sort of routine. And heavens help me, maybe I actually enjoy this routine. It’s easy, it’s stable, it’s familiar. Maybe we don’t all need to go on some wild adventure always reaching for the stars that may never reach out to us. Maybe we should just be satisfied with the way things are. And the way things are, they’re pretty good anyway. Who needs the additional stress?
Maybe changes and improvements don’t have to be some big upfront changes. Maybe they can come slowly and organically, growing out of our daily lives. Maybe change can come little by little everyday, so that you don’t even notice it and the years just pass by one after another and then you’re someone completely different again. Maybe we let go of the older things one at a time, and pick up the newer things one at a time, until one day we have a completely different set of things. And maybe that’s fine.
Well, it looks like that’s how I feel. At least for now. Who knows how I’ll wake up tomorrow.
I harbor no sentimentality for the past year. It’s just a year. An arbitrary delineation of time created only as a matter of convention. Time moves forward. We have to keep looking forward, see what the future brings.
This existential rambling madness was brought to you by the letter Q. Let’s have a good 2012 y’all.